All posts by The Comrade

At Your Cervix

It’s been 1 year and 8 months, and 4 days under Dark Brandon, and he f**ks. But don’t worry, he’s only after the corrupt. the GQP, and fascists. Also, VOTE to codify Roe v Wade!

Other Titles Considered

  • MAGA Maniacs
  • 450 Million-Dollars Old
  • Anal Dentata

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Collective Da Fuh

It’s been 1 year and 7 months, and 21 days under the dark leadership of the Brandon. He has embraced the meme and is taking the GQP head on. APPLY DIRECTLY TO THE CULTIST.

Other Titles Considered

  • Classified Milania Drawers
  • Google MAPs
  • Leather Daddy Cabinet

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Queer Gays for the Straight Guys

It’s been 1 year and 7 months, and 14 days under legal, confirmed, and RESPECTABLE leadership. This week, the president drew the line in the sand, and defined where hope lies for the future of these United Stated, and MAGA has no place in that future.

Other Titles Considered

  • Sham WOW Trans Hookers
  • Remote Tele-Dildonics
  • Anchors Away

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Acting Your Wage

It’s been 1 year and 7 months, and 7 days under legitimate, legal leadership and they are making strides! Huge debt relief for millions of people is a great first step in fixing the higher-education crisis in this country. The deficit is trending down, and massive environmental laws have been enacted.

Other Titles Considered

  • Surprise Surprise Surprise
  • Cops on Your Junk
  • To the Moon

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Mike Hunt (D)

It’s been 1 year and 7 months under legitimate, legal leadership. Things are looking super dicey for the previous president, as AG MG has a 100% conviction rate. Also, all of the bad things we predicted are happening. Sometimes, it feels bad to be right.

Other Titles Considered

  • Self Incineration
  • Make Education Terrible Again
  • Merkin Association

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Podunk Dumbass

It’s been 1 year, 6 months, and 24 days under legitimate, legal leadership. And THINGS. ARE. HAPPENING. The DoJ is finally taking public steps in its’ Espionage Act investigation of the 45th President of the United States, according to the search warrant that was made public this week. OH SNAP

Other Titles Considered

  • John Wick the Auditor
  • Butt Hurt Emails
  • Wi$ke$ha

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Canadian Hail

It’s been 1 year, 6 months, and 17 days under legitimate, legal power. This week, the President took out al-Zawahiri, saw Kansas say NO to abortion restrictions, made a deal with Manchin & Sinema, signed an executive order to help low income women pay for abortion services, & delivered a beast of a jobs report.

Other Titles Considered

  • Mango is my Watermelon
  • Benjamin Franklin Riker
  • Derriere Aware
  • More Meth in Lakeland

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Cryptoschmucks

It’s been 1 year, 6 months, and 10 days under legally elected leadership. This week we manage to avoid discussion of the Jan 6 hearings, but the GQP refuses to stop giving us topics, like anti-Semitism, rationalizing homophobia, and actively self-sabotaging their election efforts for the near future.

Other Titles Considered

  • Exacerbated Masturbation
  • Frat Bros v Seltzer Girls
  • Money for Nothing, Housing for Some

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Idiot Suntan Boii

It’s been 1 year, 6 months, and 3 days under the latest Covid-positive president. But he’s double vaxxed, double boosted, and not shying away from the necessary evils of dealing with contracting Covid. Just like we don’t shy away from right-wing dog whistles.

Other Titles Considered

  • NASCAR Bill
  • Low n Slow
  • Obamaphones

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Rot in the Consequences

It’s been 1 year, 5 months, and 26 days under legal leadership of the 46th Administration. The president is overseas this week, and while we await the results of his field trip, things don’t slow down on the domestic side.

Other Titles Considered

  • Horny for Politics
  • Left Hand Goodness
  • Tripped Over Her Emails

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